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BERNARD(rounding on SUZETTE) .... Right.  Who are you?
SUZETTEMe?
BERNARDYes, you!
ROBERTIt’s her!
BERNARDWho?
ROBERTYou know who.
BERNARDI haven’t the faintest idea who.
ROBERTYou don’t know who?
BERNARDWhy do you think I was going bananas there?  Trying to keep warm?
ROBERTI didn’t know what.... You mean that isn’t her?
SUZETTEWho?
BERNARDOf course it isn’t her.
SUZETTEWho?
ROBERTThen if that isn’t her....
SUZETTEWho?
ROBERT....who is she?
BERNARDThat’s what I want to know! Who are you?
SUZETTEI’m his girl friend.
BERNARD(to ROBERT)  Is this true?
ROBERTNo, no.
SUZETTEYes!
ROBERTNo!  That’s what I told her to say because I thought she was you-know-who.
SUZETTEWho?
ROBERTBut if she isn’t, who is?
SUZETTEWho??
BERNARDOh be quiet, you!
SUZETTEOo, how rude!
BERNARD(patiently)  Now, slowly and simply, who are you and what are you doing here?
SUZETTE(to ROBERT)  Can I tell him?
ROBERTYes, yes – tell him.
SUZETTEFor real?
ROBERTPlease.
SUZETTEI’m Suzette – from the agency.
BERNARDThe agency?
SUZETTEThe cook.  From the agency.  You should know.  You booked me.
BERNARD(collapsing)  Oh my God!
ROBERTYou cooked a book... booked a cook?
BERNARDYes.  For dinner tonight.
ROBERTAnd that’s her?
SUZETTEThat’s me.
ROBERT(collapsing beside BERNARD)  Oh my God!
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